Shire Network News - All Postings

Podcast Goes Out in a Blaze of Glory - 189

Brian of London — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 15:46:23 +0000

After long deliberation, and a visit from Darth Vader, we’ve determined that Shire Network News has come to an end. For our final episode, we feature our current voices and some from the past. Damian Penny, Andrew Ian Dodge, Meryl Yourish, Brian of London, Doug Payton and our Dear Leader, most exalted and praise be upon him, Tom Paine come together to bring you the SNN to end all SNNs (figuratively and literally).

Podcast takes a sabbatical - 188

Brian of London — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 20:50:59 +0000

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Here is the official announcement of something that has been clear for a while, Shire Network News is on a break. We're not saying it's the end.... but we're going to be quiet for a while.

187 Podcast Sets Mrs bin Laden_s Facebook Relationship Status to Single

Brian of London — Thu, 12 May 2011 14:40:13 +0000

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This week, we celebrate a big victory in the war on terror; the death of Osama bin Laden.

Meryl Yourish gives us an idea who all the college students were that we saw celebrating at Ground Zero and in Washington, DC.

Tom Paine looks back and lets us see what another May 1st would have looked like if we had the same cast of characters on the world stage.

186 Podcast Spins Tales of Pirates on the High Seas

Brian of London — Mon, 02 May 2011 20:32:28 +0000

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The mantra of the 2010s: Make love, not kinetic military action.

Don Surber thinks that jokes about what Sarah Palin's cabinet might look like don't go far enough. In this case, truth is stranger than fiction.

A former head of Britain's socialized medicine albatross died waiting for an operation. Sad, but apparently the Brits miss the irony in that.

Jimmy Carter equates Christianity with Islam in how both religions view women as inferior. Really, Jimmy? I guess if nations that are (or were) historically Christian would do things like, oh, allow women to vote, or hold jobs, or drive, or not have to cover their entire bodies with tents, then perhaps we can revisit this question.

Help support Andrew Ian Dodge's bid for glory! Here and here.

185 Podcast goes all Cowboy on Libya

Brian of London — Thu, 24 Mar 2011 21:27:44 +0000

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Once again, Shire Network News comes to you with tales of fools and their errands.

Christians in the UK are now barred from being foster parents. Indeed, now some rights are more equal than others.

The Middle East continues to erupt, particularly in Libya, where the people are trying to throw off autocratic rule by Mo-ammar, Larry-mar and Curly-mar. And in Saudi Arabia, the rumblings are beginning there, now.

Blasphemy against blasphemy laws is ... blasphemy, as one Pakistani politician found out, and paid with his life.

Circumcision may soon be against the law in San Francisco. No, really. You can abort your baby for any reason before he’s born, but after that, they own him.

The headline “Human Rights Watch Founder Bernstein Starts Advancing Human Rights” sounds rather strange. In one sense, it is strange, but in another, it’s actually quite right.

Tom Paine notices how different the Left responds to the same set of circumstances, but with a different President in office. And Meryl Yourish suggests you skip the next issue of a particular men’s magazine.

Andrew Ian Dodge, SNN alum, looking to unseat Olympia Snowe in the US Senate, got a nice write-up in National Review Online.

Closing song “The Purim Song” from The Maccabeats.

184 Podcast watches dominos fall in the Arab world

Brian of London — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 22:24:36 +0000

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Shire Network News is back with a look at the historic events in the Arab world and what may yet be coming. Mubarek is gone, and Muammar Gaddafi told the Palestinians and Israel “Let’s you and him fight”, trying to avert attention from his own dictatorship. The dominos are falling.

SNN alum Andrew Ian Dodge would have thrown his hat into the ring for the race for US Senator from the state of Maine, if he wore a hat. So with some other article of clothing, he’s going to give Olympia Snowe some Tea Party competition. Find out the latest on his campaign at his website:http://www.electthedodge.com/

Is multiculturalism working? Is it helping to keep us safe from extremists? British Prime Minister Paul Cameron thinks not. Islamic groups, for some reason, take offense at this.

A large portion of the United States had to shovel itself out from up to 2 feet of global warming.

Julian Assange nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize? Pretty soon they’ll give those things out even before you even done anything remotely peace-bringing, right Mr. Obama?

And Ronald Reagan’s 100th birthday came and went, though you may have missed it, at least in the US. Another sporting event with fouled-up national anthem lyrics and expensive commercials overshadowed it. But I think Ronnie would have smiled watching people rising up to overthrow their oppressors.

Give us a Like on our Facebook page or stop by our website at www.snnsite.com.

Closing song “Tom Paine’s Bones” by The Shee: http://www.theshee.com/

183 Podcast Sets a Civil Tone

Brian of London — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 23:54:56 +0000

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Doug Payton, Tom Paine and a new contributor (former listener) get the new year off to a good start with a brand new show!

182 Podcast Returns for Christmas Special Hunting Obama

Brian of London — Mon, 20 Dec 2010 17:13:01 +0000

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Shire Network News returns for a Christmas Special host by Doug Payton and featuring Meryl Yourish, Tom Paine and Brian of London.

181 Podcast is The Show with No Name

Brian of London — Sat, 07 Aug 2010 02:12:05 +0000

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Shire Network News is steadfastly refusing to lie down and die! To prove it, here's another show...this time hosted from within the darkest bowels of the Great Satan itself - the United States of America.

Normal host Murray in New Zealand (and we use the word "normal" in its loosest possible sense) is facing a few health challenges and can't host for a while, so for various reasons which escape us at the moment (I seem to recall there was some sort of tax angle...) we have decided to come to you from the belly of the capitalist beast itself, the sinister global hegemon behind expansionist Zionism, rampant consumption of the world's resources and the global threat posed by the continued existence of Carlos Mencia.

I refer of course to Atlanta, Georgia, and our very own Doug Payton. He's a church-going Christian who supports the constitution, so the mainstream media would like you to smile, nod, avoid making eye contact or engaging in any sudden movements which might spook him, and contact a SWAT team immediately - taking people like that down is highly dangerous folks, best leave it to the professionals.

Australia's own "Tom Paine" explains to us why some things just aren't as easy to joke about as they once were, driving him to seek relief in either the demon alcohol or the writing of epic space opera novels. Don't do it Tom! It's to dangerous! Try bourbon instead! Look what happened to Isaac Asimov and Robert A. Heinlein! They both got very rich and famous! So you ought to...hang on, what was our point again? That actually sounds pretty good.

In Blog News, will someone for gods sake give Barney Frank a dollar already, he's embarrassing himself. And Congress. If that's even possible these days.

NASA's job is to make Muslims feel good about themselves. Apparently. Who knew? And here was us foolishly clinging to the antediluvian notion that it had something to do with space exploration!

It's good to see organizations fighting the rising tide of obscenity. Why, just the other day one well-known outfit made sure to do its bit to get rid of the "C" word. Yup, from now on the YMCA is going to call itself just "The Y" Why? Apparently "Christian" is just plain embarrassing.

In our bulging "Fatwa of the Week" section, Molly Norris drew a picture of a teacup and now she has a fatwa. What, are they delivering Islamic death sentences free with every box of Cheerios these days? She called the teacup Mohamad. Oh well, there you go, that explains it. Called a teacup "Mohammad". Death, next case please.

President Obama has finally lowered the boom on Al Qaeda. He's gone medieval on their ass. He's had enough and he doesn't care who knows it. He has characterised them as...what? Mass murderers? Bombers of girls schools? Insane religious cultists who worship death and mock the concept of a loving and merciful god by their mere existence? Nope. Worse. MUCH worse. He says they are...you already know what's coming, don't you? Racists. Hey, Al Sharpton, Charlie Rangel, Jesse Jackson! the boss says you should head off to the Af-Pak border to see this Osama Bin Laden guy, shake him down for some donations or we'll call him a racist again., Hey, it works with major US companies, right?

And finally in "Consider This", Doug Payton discusses the Worst Place In The World, the lowest pit of torment. pain and degradation that has ever existed, a permanent stain on the conscience of America, a flicker of hell at the tip of Cuba known as "Guantanamo Bay". Which is so terrible, so sickeningly awful a place, so bowel-liquifyingly hideous that some of the poor innocents locked up there for no reason whatsoever...er...want to stay there rather than go home. Wait, what? Yup, six Algerians. Turns out Gitmo is some sort of Club Med compared to Algeria. Frankly, we see their point. Coming up next week, tourist brochures for bus tours of the Land of Mordor sell out in Syria, Yemen, Libya and parts of the South Bronx.

Think you could be both funny and topical? Funnier than us, we mean? Yeah, you probably could be, you'll get no argument here. Why not put it to the test. Have you got what it takes to join the fast-paced world of international political humour podcasting? Impress attractive members of the opposite sex! Win exciting cash prizes! Influence global opinion leaders! We can guaruntee that absolutely none of these things will happen if you send your auditions to pacificjournalist@gmail.com And if yo'reu an eccentric and somewhat irresponsible conservative rich person, please send us money. The Left told us conservatives are all evil rich white dudes who pay people to pretend to support their policies. So, uh, when do our cheques from the National Association of Fat Cat Billionaires arrive? Hello? Is this thing on? Man, that's the last time we believe anything the Left tell us.

Around the net, find Shire Network News on Facebook and give us a Like. You’ll be among the first to find out when new shows are out, discuss the topics, and submit ideas for Blog News. And tell your friends and family; there really is a podcast out there that tells it like it is. Well, like it ought to be. Well, if they know what a podcast is. Well, if you have any friends. Well, tell your mom.

180 Podcast unveils new novelist

Brian of London — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 20:31:59 +0000

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Britain, home of the PC PC, comes up with another example of how to be a jobsworth - coming up with no less than two excuses for not jumping into the sea to save a drowning man.

TV hard man Bear Grylls meets a 12 year old Australian scout and is made to look like a giant pussy.

Reuters indulges in sneer quote overkill when it comes to American hikers captured by Iran.

David Horowitz uncovers the true face of hate at (where else) an American university.

Seth McFarlane takes a dump on America...again (and it's not even funny, but we're starting to get used to that).

And we bring you news of the single most significant political struggle in modern American history - don't believe us? You will when you hear the campaign ad.

We bring you an example of why the English language should probably not be entrusted to the English anymore, or at least one specific English sports reporter. And David Mitchell has a message from the Queen, so sit up straight and tuck your shirt in.

"Tom Paine" wants your help in writing he Great Australian Science Fiction novel.

And Doug Payton wonders when Comedy Central will show actual, as opposed to completely fake, courage.