Shire Network News - The Podcast Feed!

181 Podcast is The Show with No Name

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 19:12:05 +0000

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Shire Network News is steadfastly refusing to lie down and die! To prove it, here's another show...this time hosted from within the darkest bowels of the Great Satan itself - the United States of America.

Normal host Murray in New Zealand (and we use the word "normal" in its loosest possible sense) is facing a few health challenges and can't host for a while, so for various reasons which escape us at the moment (I seem to recall there was some sort of tax angle...) we have decided to come to you from the belly of the capitalist beast itself, the sinister global hegemon behind expansionist Zionism, rampant consumption of the world's resources and the global threat posed by the continued existence of Carlos Mencia.

I refer of course to Atlanta, Georgia, and our very own Doug Payton. He's a church-going Christian who supports the constitution, so the mainstream media would like you to smile, nod, avoid making eye contact or engaging in any sudden movements which might spook him, and contact a SWAT team immediately - taking people like that down is highly dangerous folks, best leave it to the professionals.

Australia's own "Tom Paine" explains to us why some things just aren't as easy to joke about as they once were, driving him to seek relief in either the demon alcohol or the writing of epic space opera novels. Don't do it Tom! It's to dangerous! Try bourbon instead! Look what happened to Isaac Asimov and Robert A. Heinlein! They both got very rich and famous! So you ought to...hang on, what was our point again? That actually sounds pretty good.

In Blog News, will someone for gods sake give Barney Frank a dollar already, he's embarrassing himself. And Congress. If that's even possible these days.

NASA's job is to make Muslims feel good about themselves. Apparently. Who knew? And here was us foolishly clinging to the antediluvian notion that it had something to do with space exploration!

It's good to see organizations fighting the rising tide of obscenity. Why, just the other day one well-known outfit made sure to do its bit to get rid of the "C" word. Yup, from now on the YMCA is going to call itself just "The Y" Why? Apparently "Christian" is just plain embarrassing.

In our bulging "Fatwa of the Week" section, Molly Norris drew a picture of a teacup and now she has a fatwa. What, are they delivering Islamic death sentences free with every box of Cheerios these days? She called the teacup Mohamad. Oh well, there you go, that explains it. Called a teacup "Mohammad". Death, next case please.

President Obama has finally lowered the boom on Al Qaeda. He's gone medieval on their ass. He's had enough and he doesn't care who knows it. He has characterised them as...what? Mass murderers? Bombers of girls schools? Insane religious cultists who worship death and mock the concept of a loving and merciful god by their mere existence? Nope. Worse. MUCH worse. He says they are...you already know what's coming, don't you? Racists. Hey, Al Sharpton, Charlie Rangel, Jesse Jackson! the boss says you should head off to the Af-Pak border to see this Osama Bin Laden guy, shake him down for some donations or we'll call him a racist again., Hey, it works with major US companies, right?

And finally in "Consider This", Doug Payton discusses the Worst Place In The World, the lowest pit of torment. pain and degradation that has ever existed, a permanent stain on the conscience of America, a flicker of hell at the tip of Cuba known as "Guantanamo Bay". Which is so terrible, so sickeningly awful a place, so bowel-liquifyingly hideous that some of the poor innocents locked up there for no reason whatsoever...er...want to stay there rather than go home. Wait, what? Yup, six Algerians. Turns out Gitmo is some sort of Club Med compared to Algeria. Frankly, we see their point. Coming up next week, tourist brochures for bus tours of the Land of Mordor sell out in Syria, Yemen, Libya and parts of the South Bronx.

Think you could be both funny and topical? Funnier than us, we mean? Yeah, you probably could be, you'll get no argument here. Why not put it to the test. Have you got what it takes to join the fast-paced world of international political humour podcasting? Impress attractive members of the opposite sex! Win exciting cash prizes! Influence global opinion leaders! We can guaruntee that absolutely none of these things will happen if you send your auditions to pacificjournalist@gmail.com And if yo'reu an eccentric and somewhat irresponsible conservative rich person, please send us money. The Left told us conservatives are all evil rich white dudes who pay people to pretend to support their policies. So, uh, when do our cheques from the National Association of Fat Cat Billionaires arrive? Hello? Is this thing on? Man, that's the last time we believe anything the Left tell us.

Around the net, find Shire Network News on Facebook and give us a Like. You’ll be among the first to find out when new shows are out, discuss the topics, and submit ideas for Blog News. And tell your friends and family; there really is a podcast out there that tells it like it is. Well, like it ought to be. Well, if they know what a podcast is. Well, if you have any friends. Well, tell your mom.

180 Podcast unveils new novelist

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 13:31:59 +0000

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Britain, home of the PC PC, comes up with another example of how to be a jobsworth - coming up with no less than two excuses for not jumping into the sea to save a drowning man.

TV hard man Bear Grylls meets a 12 year old Australian scout and is made to look like a giant pussy.

Reuters indulges in sneer quote overkill when it comes to American hikers captured by Iran.

David Horowitz uncovers the true face of hate at (where else) an American university.

Seth McFarlane takes a dump on America...again (and it's not even funny, but we're starting to get used to that).

And we bring you news of the single most significant political struggle in modern American history - don't believe us? You will when you hear the campaign ad.

We bring you an example of why the English language should probably not be entrusted to the English anymore, or at least one specific English sports reporter. And David Mitchell has a message from the Queen, so sit up straight and tuck your shirt in.

"Tom Paine" wants your help in writing he Great Australian Science Fiction novel.

And Doug Payton wonders when Comedy Central will show actual, as opposed to completely fake, courage.

179 Podcast attempts to blow up car in New York, burns lips on exhaust pipe

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 10 May 2010 13:15:00 +0000

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Continuing our carefully thought out policy of confusing the enemy by putting out shows at highly irregular intervals, thereby taking them by surprise (along with our actual listeners) SNN is back with another of our increasingly misnamed weekly shows.

New presenter Murray is replaced temporarily by Doug Payton in Atlanta, making this the first time SNN has been entirely in American hands. Murray has some software problems that haven't responded to his standard method of resolving difficulties, i.e. striking them repeatedly with a medieval weapon. You might be surprised how effective that usually is.

We have some blog news about the isolated lone wolf extremist who attempted to explode an SUV in Times Square. He seem (according to the experts who run the editorial page of the New York Times) to have gone off the rails when he fell behind on his payments and had his house was repossessed by the bank. Taking half a year off to go to a Pakistani training camp to learn how to blow shit up courtesy of the Taliban does tend to put something of a hole in one's finances. If only there was some obvious reason for his actions. It makes no rational sense. Most people who manage to get a parking space on Times Square tend to be a lot happier about it than this guy. His possible links to the Tea Party are of course the prime focus of the current investigation.

"Leave no man behind on the battlefield" is a code the British SAS live be. Shame the MOD doesn't see it that way. Too bad for the red tabs at HQ that the SAS told them they were going ahead and following the code anyway, and if London didn't like it, then London could have the entire Regiment's resignation.

A man in the UK attempted to put up a memorial to the small boats that helped the Royal Navy evacuate British anjd French soldiers from Dunkirk in 1940. Regular listeners have a pretty good idea what's coming. Did you know the expression "World War II" is offensive? Yeah, us neither,

"Tom Paine" is along with another look at how the famous Thousand Bomber Raid on Cologne might have been covered by today's journalists.

And Doug Payton introduces himself along with an economics lesson that Greece might have benefited from if it has been paying attention for the last 30 years. In what alternate reality is "spending more money that you have" a sound economic policy?

We don't mention the UK election because frankly Brown, Clegg and Cameron deserve each other, and it's just too depressing for words. The Tories had the biggest open goal ever in front of them, a keeper who was rolling around outside the penalty box clutching his shin in pain, the opposition defenders were all peering hawkishly in the wrong direction and the ball landed right at the strikers feet with all the time in the world to take the simplest imaginable shot.

And he missed.

Just speaking hypothetically here, but how many of our listeners on the US eastern seaboard and in the Canadian Maritimes have boats capable of doing a return trip across the Atlantic? No reason, just, you know, in theory, in the event of things getting even worse than they already are.

178 Podcast Returns to 1940s

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 07:30:26 +0000

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Shire Network News is back within a week of the first one foir 2010 being put up! Didn't think we meant it when we said we'd be returning to a weekly format, did you?

This week the Anglosphere's hardest-hitting political podcast returns to the dark days of the 1940s and wonders what would have happened if today's soft-cock politicians and thinkers had been in charge of the United States. The results are about as unpleasant as...well, as reading the news today I suppose. Indulging you enemies and kicking your allies square in the yarbles - how do you think that's likely to work out in the end. Read some history people, with special reference to the Byzantine Empire's alliances of convenience with the Muslims against the Latin Crusaders, and how well that paid off for them. Check out those minarets currently flanking the Haigia Sophia in Constantinople and draw your own conclusions. Yes, we said Constantinople, please e-mail the subsequent fatwas directly to our lawyers.

New presenter Murray introduces you Americans who are about to enter the wonderful world of state-funded health care to the concept of the "waiting list", discusses the definition of the word "spar-lash" in relation to Russian violations of UK airspace (the enemy is always probing people, never forget that, what happened when an adult rescued a schoolchild from up a tree (this is he UK we're talking about, so you can probably work out what's coming), why you can't get a baconburger in certain UK KFC's anymore (you already know why, lets be honest), and why Norwegians aren't massively popular in New Zealand just at the moment. And Doug Payton is along to add his voice to the many, many commentators unhappy at the US lurch towards Euroweenism.

The new presenter, Murray, can be found here (swearing encouraged) and here (less swearing, more trebuchets).

177 Podcast Mocks Canadian Human Rights Laws

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 13:57:06 +0000

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A new-look Shire Network News hits the airwaves, with a new host, new attitude, and perhaps most importantly, no script!

We'll be moving to a weekly format from now own, and the show will probably be shorter and punchier. By which we mean if you don't listen to it, one of us will find out where you live, come round one night and punch you.

This week we catch up with a Canadian comedian who is being dragged in front of one of Canada's bogus "Human Rights" kangaroo courts for the hideous sin of...well, telling jokes apparently. Now you and I and certain other head-in-the-clouds no-hopes might cling to the charmingly antediluvian notion that it's not all that unusual for a comedian to tell jokes, but under close, time consuming and massively expensive legal scrutiny, this turns out not to be the case.

Guy Earle wasn't particularly political before this happened, but he's been...ahem..."radicalised" by the experience. He's due to appear before the British Columbia Human Rights Tribunal in Vancouver on March 29 - if you're in town that day, go along and support him. Keep him away from the hemlock.

Doug Payton is here with Consider This, ad we have a new contributor to SNN, the UK-based Dangerously Subversive Dad, with a tale of what happens when your wife fights off a drugged-up knife-wielding maniac bent on car-jacking her. She made the obvious error of fighting back. Even worse, she was successful! Those of you who have been paying attention know what's about to happen, but don't give out any spoilers - the look of shock on the face of newcomers to this sort of site when they realise what the constabulary is really up to is always priceless. Wait for the tale of the horse-tail-plaiting Witches of Sussex at the end. No, we're not kidding.

The new presenter, Murray, can be found here (swearing encouraged) and here (less swearing, more trebuchets). Tom is still going to be part of SNN each week, he's just going to be doing individual items and interviews rather than anchor the whole show. He kept complaining about having to "work" in order to "pay the mortgage" and be able to "eat food" occasionally or some such soft-cock excuse for total laziness.

176 Podcast Promotes Religious Freedom For Everyone

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 20:28:21 +0000

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In this final edition of Shire Network News for 2009, we speak to Pastor Ameal Haddad of Ambassadors For Peace. His idea is that people around the world should have religious freedom. I know, crazy, right? Maybe it's so crazy it might just work through. Check out their website and maybe throw them a few dollars in donations.

In Blog News, the British National Party offers to sell out Gibraltar to Spanish fascists, so that's another reason to kick them firmly in the yarbles; former Christian Peacemaker in Iraq turned hostage, turned ungrateful rescued hostage Norman Kember says the religious nutters who kidnapped him and a few others were quite nice blokes really, and they only nailed his head to the floor a little bit; the UK military's top chaplain says these Taliban johnnies are actually not quit as bad as they're painted, and if we could just invite them round for some of the Ladies Guild's delicious pancakes with strawberry jam, he's quite sure we could sort out all this "blowing civiilians up and trying to kill British troops" nonsense, which was probably the result of a misunderstanding somewhere, I mean everyone's a decent enough sort of chap deep down aren't they?; a man attending a Palestinian Carol service in London tells Jews what he thinks of them; those rascally Hebrews are once again feeding teenage Palestinian girls magic Jew gum that makes them horny (teenagers really need chemical assistance to make them think about sex, as you know); and we have an update on the dancer who took taxpayers money in order to have an epileptic fit on stage. It's Art - you peasants wouldn't understand. But we'll still take that Arts Council cash off you, thanks mate.

Meryl Yourish brings us a revealing interview with Al Gore, aka the man behind the curtain we're not supposed to pay any attention to, Doug Payton proudly prognosticates on his prodigious powers of precognition, and Brian of London is still brutally occupying Tel Aviv. Possibly after taking the advice of that bloke at the carol service who wants all Jews to "f**k off back to Israel", although oddly enough people like him seen equally determined that Jews should simultaneously get out of Israel as well. Logic doesn't seem to be their strong suit.

And Tom Paine in Melbourne talks about the meaning of the season. Swords and prodigious amounts of throat-punching and face-smashing are involved. Physical and spiritual resistance to evil are both considered and found to be important in their own way, and the Maccabean dynasty continues to get it's by now customary poor performance reviews. There's nothing B+ about the Maccabees, we're talking about an initial burst of wild enthusiasm, followed by the dawning realisation that putting them in charge was in reality a really, really bad idea which we would all pay for in the long run.

Not that we're drawing any historical parallels or anything...

175 Podcast Calls For The Application of Rule .303

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 11:53:45 +0000

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In this episode of Shire Network News, Brtish foreign policy specialist and non-insane person (the two tend to be mutually exclusive these days) Robin Shepherd talks to Tom Paine about a new TV documentary in which the UK's foreign policy is portrayed as completely in thrall to sinister, shadowy "Zionist" businessmen, who manipulate politicians and journalists from the shadows. It turns out the British media is totally controlled by these "Zionists", which I must say is quite a relief. Here was me thinking they were a pack of Jew-hating arseholes who never missed a chance to tell lies about Israel and whitewash Islamist groups! I recommend watching such programs, it's really rather comforting to be told we secretly run the world. Makes a change from the usual threats to slaughter us all with knives and/or drop atomic bombs on us until we're not alive any more.

Mr Shepherd is also the author of "A State Beyond the Pale: Europe's Problem With Israel". Heh. Beyond the Pale. That's clever that is. Historical allusion to Eastern Europe and the Pale of Settlement. See, and they say an Oxbridge education isn't worth as much as it used to be. That's some some quality referencing and clever juxtapositioning right there in the title, imagine how good the book itself is going to be.

Doug Payton lists the achievements of Obama's first year in office (hint, he's taking the piss), Meryl Yourish reveals that David Ickes was right all along, and Brian of London suggests the Palestinians be made to sit on the naughty stool until they give Gilad Shalit back.

In Blog News, the Royal Navy covers its reputation in some lame-ass shit as it tries to pretend that having Somali pirates capture British citizens on the high seas while an RN vessel loaded with Royal Marines sits back and watches the entire process without doing anything about it is perfectly normal. The terrifying thing is, in the modern Navy with everyone at the top level heavily indoctrinated with political correctness, sitting around with one's finger us one's nose may well be the new normal.

And for any of our colonials who might be about to make a crack about goddamn limey fruits, limp dicks and other merry traditional trans-Atlantic jibes, the US Navy Seals who captured the bastard responsible for the murder and hideous mutilation of four US security guards in Fallujah are now facing a trial because the guy now sports a fat lip. This is not a positive development, to say the least.You can't fight a war as if it's an episode of Law & Order. Mind you, putting Fred Thompson in charge would not be the worst idea around.

We hear a detailed explanation about the constitutional and electoral process under which some random Belgian with freakish hair became Supreme Leader of Europe.

We have some fun with BNP leader Nick Griffin, and document the decadent collapse of the West via the medium of an artist" who is getting paid pubic money to hold a "dance" event consisting of her having an epileptic seizure on stage. When your society sponsors artists for whom the first stage of their inspiration consists of "stopping their medication" I think we can agree the game is basically over.

Oh and would be be a dear and go vote for SNN in the Podcast Awards? It's so embarrassing if we come in dead last. Especially if it's the final podcast awards before the total collapse of western civilisation. Boy would our face be red if that happened and we didn't have another chance to do better next year! Shire Network News will be back again in two weeks time, assuming any of us are still alive.

174 Podcast Asks Why New Zealand Is So Damned PC

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 17:20:45 +0000

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This week's special guest is New Zealand journalist and author Ian Wishart, who explains why New Zealand is, if you can believe such a thing, even more PC, multi-culti and obsessed with apocalyptic global warming than Canada.

He also has some excellent books for sale at his website, in particular Air Con and Eve's Bite.

Doug Payton wants us to reclaim the word bonkers, which you don't hear nearly enough these days, especially when describing some of our alleged national leaders.

Meryl Yourish examines the US government's attitude to terrorism, which it doesn't seem keen on calling terrorism, and it sets her right off. She is not alone in this.

And an old friend, Brian of London, is back in the Zionist Entity, opressing, discriminating and occupying for all he's worth. He may be facing rocket attacks from Hizbollah in the north and Hamas in the south, random bomb blasts from terrorist infiltrators plus the threat of nuclear annihilation from the general direction of Iran over the eastern horizon, but at least it beats a cold, dark November freezing his tuchis off in north-west London.

If you enjoy Shire Network News, why not vote for us at the Podcast Awards? We're listed in the 'Best Political Podcast' category.

173 Podcast Discovers British Muslims for Secular Democracy - 173

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 06:40:57 +0000

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This week's show features a special guest - Tehmina Kazi, Director of British Muslims for Secular Democracy. Yes, at last! Break out the bunting and set off some fireworks, the moderates seem to have discovered their voice at last. And although we have the audio from their wonderful ad attacking the pro-jihad lunatics we so often see on TV, do be sure and watch the video as well. They're scheduled to stage a counter-demonstration against an Islamist protest in London on Saturday, so they don't lack guts. Give them your support.

Doug Pyaton asks what would have happened if Bushhitler McHalliburton, the world's dumbest evil genius, aka former President George W Bush, had even considered doing some of the things President Obama has done to the media. Remember, it's not a threat to free speech of a Democrat does it.

In Blog News we hear about a Lib-Dem Council in the UK banning all adults, including parents, from children's playgrounds;.

And we ponder the balance between legitimate needs for public surveillance against potential terrorist activity on the one hand, and freaking out, screaming incoherently that "they" are coming to murder us all in our beds and running around like our hair was on fire on the other. Security is important and the threat has not been invented by Dick Cheny to boost the value of his stock portfolio. On the other hand, I'd prefer that the government not give me a rectal probe every time I get on a tram. Andrew Sullivan may have a different view, I really don't know.

Jimmy Carter says something that would get a Republican put on CNN on an hourly basis under the headline "Resignation Watch, Day Two", but he gets away with it because...er...well because he's a Democrat and it's not racism if a Democrat does it. It's just not, okay? Which party was it that all those politicians and sheriffs down south belonged to, the ones who stood in schoolhouse doors and set dogs and fire hoses on black demonstrators? Clue: it wasn't the Republican party.

An amusing and provocative high school answering machine message turns out to be a fake. A funny, satirical, genius-level fake.

And we heartily endorse a new campaign to "make deadshits history". Warning - Aussie style harsh language!

Plus a plea for all your foreigners to harden up and travel to Australia. Latest figures indicate that some tourists actually survive the experience!

Podcast Opposes A Military Coup (Directors Cut) - 172

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 13:45:11 +0000

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Second Upload! The first one was cut short, probably caused by an Islamic insurgency.

In this week's Shire Network News podcast, host "Tom Paine" interviews retired US Army special forces Colonel Gordon Cucullu about the effects of Obama Derangement Syndrome on the conservative side of politics in America - especially one particularly lunatic suggestion by columnist John Perry that President Barack Obama might be removed from power in a military coup. You remember how well those have worked out wherever they've been attempted in the past?

Oh, and if John Perry gets to hear about this, we are open to having him on the show as a feature guest to respond to our no doubt unfounded and ill-informed criticisms of his brilliant idea. Yes, advocating a military coup to overthrow the democratically elected President of the United States, always a fast track to wealth, success and respect. Bring a whole bunch of really good arguments John, but be warned, we tend not to lose arguments on this podcast. Especially about minor, trivial, completely inconsequential things like, oh, I don't know, upholding the Constitution of the United Staes! I can't remember the part where it says "...unless you don't like the President's policies, in which case just have some blokes in uniform show up to tell him he can take the rest of the afternoon off, hell, take the rest of his term, his services are no longer required." I must have been out taking a whiz when we covered that bit in first year political science.

Oh, and buy Colonel Cucullu's book about Gitmo, it's amazing what the mainstream media haven't told you about it.

Meryl Yourish is along to pile on the juvenile scorn about President Obama being awarded the Nobel Prize for Not Being George W Bush; and Doug Payton sells us some government cheese.

In Blog news we discuss the latest scientific research conducted in the field of controlled building demolitions and the viscosity of steel in extreme heat environments carried out by Professor Charles Sheen of the University of California Center For the Study of the Effect on Humans of Advanced Chemical Compounds and Prolonged Sex With Whores. In particular, we attempt to answer the age old philosophical conundrum of why that man even has a career in the first place.

British teachers reveal their fight against the dangers posed by patriotism, a boy gets a permanent black mark on his school record and is forced to make a public apology for playing soldiers, Christians aren't allowed to put up flyers at their local library while Muslims can, and New Zealand prime minister John Key makes a triumphant appearance on Letterman. Makes you wonder what Dave made him do to get that, huh? [rim shot] We have an alternative top ten list of reasons to visit New Zealand, and no, "Because my cousin who runs a fishing charter business in the Bay of islands needs the money" isn't one of them, true though it might be.

And we end with two visions of achieving peace. We favour one over the other. See if you can guess which one, and why.

Oh, and before we forget, it's that time of year again, when the Podcast Awards take nominations. Show your support for the best podcast on the planet. (And while you're there, nominate Shire Network News, too.)

http://podcastawards.com/

According to the voting rules, you can nominate one show for either "People's Choice" or "Best Produced" *and* one other category. Let's pool our voting power and go for the "People's Choice" and "Political" categories. While SNN does do satire, it's not aiming to be a comedy podcast, and while we do occasionally pan Michael Moore movies, the "Movies / Films" category is a bit of a stretch.

You only get one shot at nominating, so make sure the URL is okey dokey:

http://www.snnsite.com/

And thanks for your nomination!

172 Podcast Opposes A Military Coup

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 20:16:30 +0000

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Oh, and buy Colonel Cucullu's book about Gitmo, it's amazing what the mainstream media haven't told you about it.

Meryl Yourish is along to pile on the juvenile scorn about President Obama being awarded the Nobel Prize for Not Being George W Bush; and Doug Payton sells us some government cheese.

And we end with two visions of achieving peace. We favour one over the other. See if you can guess which one, and why.

171 Podcast Accounts For Its Sins

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 13:46:39 +0000

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Shire Network News is taking a break for the Jewish High Holy Days, but "Tom Paine" is along to apologise for the break in transmission, explain the significance of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, confess his sins and reveal his fatal Peter, Paul & Mary connection. Is there an organistion to help former leftists who can't completely break away from their emotional attatchment to the folk music of their childhood? Are you a foriegn policy hawk, small government advocate or pro-Israel activist, but still have old Woody Guthrie, Odetta and Phil Ochs LPs at the back of your closet? Do you attend PNAC seminars about US global force projection in the 21st century while daydreaming about getting off a bus in Oxford, Mississippi, in 1965 with a bunch of other students and getting attacked by a mob of racists? Did you smile at obscure reference in "A Mighty Wind" while other conservatives Just Didn't Get It? Yeah, you're not alone.

170 Podcast Asks Spengler About the Decline of the West

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 18:12:05 +0000

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In this fortnight's installment of the premier pro-Western political satire podcast in the English speaking world (not the most fiercely contested category, granted, but we like to keep the flag flying) we hear about the decline of the West from Asia Times columnist "Spengler".

He recently outed himself as actually being David Goldman, who is a harpsichordist of some note, an economist, writer, history buff and general Renaissance man. I didn't ask him to rub his belly and pat his head at the same time, but I'm pretty confident he would be perfectly capable of doing so, while simultaneously chiding me for my sloppy comparison of the modern European Union with the Plains Indians in the 1890s. Warning - don't even think of trying to out-clever this man.

I think my IQ shot up by ten points just by being in the same room. Yes, yes, I know, that would be a promotion from moron to merely being as thick as two short planks, most amusing, see I can fill in your inevitable comments before you even make them.

Meryl Yourish is along to try to count the number of Czars President Obama has created (hint: WAY more than the Romanovs!) and in blog news we bring you the cheerful news that British soldiers will now train with blanks instead of live rounds. Next year the MOD expects to equip combat regiments with the latest Labour Party approved non-lethal firearms that have a stick inside them which pops out when your pull the trigger and a flag with the words "Bang" unfurls. I think the idea is that Johnny Taliban will die laughing.

Hamas objects to a history curriculum containing history, on the grounds that it's a part of history they don't much care for. Hamas clearly are in the running to take over curriculum development for several formerly western nations. Some say that actually happened years ago, we just weren't paying close attention.

We have an entry which we think will win top prize in World's Most Unintentionally Hilarious Suicide Bombings, the Muslim Public Affairs Committee in the UK, in yet another example of Do As I Say, Not As I Do, objects to a political candidate on racial grounds (no prizes for guess which race), and David Thompson brings us more examples, as if more were needed, of the decadence and depravity that is modern academia. I mean, who wouldn't want to get front row seats to a seminar on: Embodying Posthumanist Intersectionality and Resisting Transhumanist ‘Enhancement’ Through Feminist Veganism? Uh, can anyone translate that into English? Should we even make the attempt?

169 Podcast Sceptical on Global Warming

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 17:34:17 +0000

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In this edition of Shire Network News, we hear about the scientific opposition to the current global warming fad, so popular among arm-flailing hysterics these days. Professor Ian Plimer, author of "Heaven and Earth" is our feature guest. Play this for your grennie friends and watch their head explode!

Meryl Yourish is along to comment on wha happens when "moderate" Palestinians do extreme things (nothing apparently), and Doug Paytom discussesreligious persecution of a kind you'll find is curiously missing from the pages of the Guardian.

In Blog Ners, the Scottish government frees the Lockerbie Bomber, and if that doesn't cause a zombie army of dead Scots soldiers to rise from their graves to feast on the flesh of the Scottish Nationalist Party then nothing will. It'd probably be shortlived, I understand zombies need brains, and there's little evidence of that among the SNP.

A Swedish mainstream newspaper discovers its inner Nazi and informs the public that the Jews are murdering people to steal their organs. Next week I'm sure they'll be onto well-poisoning and by the end of the year Jews will doubtless be held ccountable for spreading the Black Death as well. Welcome Europe in the 21st century. Orth 12h. Isso eas to eh nmneras mixedup.

The UK foriegn minister, David Milliband says terrorism can be justified in some circumstances, and wonders why everyone is getting upset about it, and a Palestinian man sells land to Jews and is sentenced to death. See above comment about which century we're living in.

And MSNBCiscovers it has an amazing ability to turn a black man white through the miracle of cropping video footage. It's all part of the whacky World Of Tomorrow that is the 21st centiry. This is NOT what my science fiction novels promised me as a teenager. It was all supposed to be engineers, rocketeers, steely-eyed scientists with slide rules and rationaility by now. Who knew the peasants with flaming torches and pitchforks would make such a comeback?

And a huge apology from Brian of London who was devastatingly late in getting this show out. Tom, Meryl and Doug... I'm sorry. I blame the global Jihad of course!

168 Podcast Dissects Obamacare

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 19:43:39 +0000

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In this fortnightly show, Meryl Yourish tells us how government run health care is profoundly un-American, and why Obama will fail in his attempt to turn the US into Europe.

We have some excellent news from the front lines on the war on terror...you know, the one the Obama administration insists doesn't exist? It seems a top Asian terror master has gone down in a hail of Indonesian bullets, an Islamic cult in Nigeria has been brutally yet effectively massacred by the policeand army, and a Taliban leader in Afghanistan is taken out by a Black Watch sniper...from ONE MILE AWAY! We detect a trend here, and long may it continue.

We catch up on the latest Metropolitan Police rules on what WPCS must wear in mosques, and what police officers shouldn't.

And what appearsto be a radical and exciting new approch to making economic policy has emerged at a public hearing in Santa Cruz. You won't believe your ears! (Seriously).

Doug Payton also makes a passing reference to liberal clergy who apparently thought putting a Bible in an art gallery and asking people to write things in it would be a wizard wheeze which couldn't possibly go horribly wrong.

They might like to try that with a Koran, but apprently even liberal christians have a vestigal sense of self-preservation, even if they would never admit to themselves the real reason they'd never pull the same stunt with Islamic scripture.

And we say a very special hello to the newest additions to the SNN family - baby boys for both Brian of London/Tel Aviv and Damian Penny in Halifax, Nova Scotia! Mazal Tovs all round...

167 Podcast helps Conservatives come out of the closet

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 08:52:57 +0000

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In the latest, somewhat delayed, edition of Shire Network News, "Tom Paine" interviews Charles Winecoff, a contributor to the Big Hollywood blog for conservatives working in the creative arts. He says coming out as a conservative was harder than telling people he was gay.

In Blog News, we reveal the awful truth behind the Dick Cheney secret CIA program - that it wasn't actually implemented; the Camel Corps in the British Foreign Office impose an arms embargo on...well it's not China or Iran or Burma, we're sure you can figure out that it's You Know Who; Harriet Harperson decrees people like Michael Parkinson are now Official Victims by declaring war against anti-Northern prejudice; and Australian Environment Minister and former lead singer of Midnight Oil, Peter Garrett, approves a new mine in South Australia! Rock on Pete - way to fight The Man!

The world spins out of control as we head towards te end of what has been, I think we can all admit, a particularly low, dishonest decade, and Phyllis Chesler has noticed the similarities between today and the immediate pre-war summers of 1914 and 1939. But "Tom Paine" has discovered a commentary on the world scene which was recorded a while ago which is still well worth listening to. Regular listeners may have already worked out who the speaker is.

There's a poignant song by Connie Dover as well, and if you like it, please go and buy more of her great stuff.

And Doug Payton and Meryl Yourish both comment on Obama care - they seem curiously reluctant to wind up with Austin Powers teeth, NHS spectacles, and hospitals with things like ten month waiting lists for a bed in a maternity ward.

166 Podcast Tries to Wake Europe Up

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 18:38:03 +0000

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In this edition of Shire Network News, Tom Paine interviews Bruce Bawer, the Oslo-based US author of "While Europe Slept: How Radical Islam is Destroying the West from Within" and Surrender: Appeasing Islam, Sacrificing Freedom about his experiences as a gay man in what he thought would be a more tolerant European society, and what happened when he ran into radical Islam on the streets of Amsterdam one night.

Doug Payton laments the way celebrity culture is warping out culture, but lays the blame squarely on you, the viewer!

Meryl Yourish is scathing about the media's double standard over Sarah Palin.

In blog news, Barack Obama decides the struggle of the people of Iran to be free of the tyrannical mullahs can be best be helped by the United States standing quietly to one side and just watching, British authorities refuse to identify prison escapers because that might infringe their right to privacy, and the Church of England still doesn't grasp it's facing its own demise within 30 years.

We also have a special Shire Network News salute to Canada, and we heartily endorse the assertion that the final letter of the alphabet is pronounced "Zed", not "Zee".

165 Podcast Bears Any Burden, Pays Any Price

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 12:55:25 +0000

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In this latest fortnightly instalment of Shire Network News, we speak to Israeli historian Yaacov Lozowick, author of "Right to Exist: A Moral Defense of Israel's Wars" and a former peace activist who found himself voting for (gulp) Sharon. Left to right - tell us the old, old story. And maybe ask why it so rarely happens the other way round.

There is lots on the situation in Iran, although as things are moving so fast there's no point in dwelling on breaking news, it'll be ancient history by the time this podcast is available. But it's safe to say that President Obama has not exactly covered himself with glory. It's 3am and a phone is ringing in the White House. And this time it's not just one of Hillary's attack ads. How safe do you feel America?

We have contributions from Doug Payton about the Great Letterman Joke Disaster of '09, and Meryl Yourish takes a close look at Obama's performance this week, and works out what makes him angry. Really angry. And it's not vicious repression of democracy.

We also cover the unfolding political crisis in Britain, where Supreme Leader Ayatollah Brown still clings to power despite being crushed in the recent elections.

A Newsweek editor reveals that Obama has ascended from his previous position as The Anointed One, and got that big promotion all the way to GOD!

Israel's military get fresh ideas for weapon systems from Arab newspaper cartoons in the wake of it's unveiling of the Battle Snake.. The giant bat is a real winner.

And the UK government comes up with possibly the stupidest and most pointless (har!) way to fight knife crime in the long, sad history of stupid ideas. Ladies and gentlemen - the stab-proof knife! Now to work out how to develop the stab-proof pointy stick or failing that a means of swathing the entire population in stab-proof bubble wrap.

We end with some comparisons between Poland in 1945 and Iran today. Lets's not repeat the betrayals of the past.

164 Podcast Tries To Define Torture

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 08:18:57 +0000

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In this edition, Tom Paine chats to Cliff May, head of the Foundation for the Defence of Democracies, about his recent appearence on The Daily Show With Jon Stewart, civility in political discourse, and what constitutes torture? Tom Paine dives into the SNN mail bag, a public service announcement is made regarding a man wandering the streets of London, scared, confused, completely out of touch with reality and convinced he is the prime minister, Australia's "chick, chick, boom" girl shows she she's become a tiny celebrity, Doug Payton compares and contrasts two very different responses to two murders this week, and Mery Yourish reviews President Obama speech in Cairo. Two thumbs way, way down would be an understatement.

163 Podcast Looks For Its Mojo

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Fri, 22 May 2009 19:26:11 +0000

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"Tom Paine" in Australia joins Meryl Yourish in Richmond Virgina, and "Brian of London" in...er...Tel Aviv for a three-way discussion about life, politics, Jihadi's attacking on every front while Obama sits back, peers hawkishly in the opposite direction and says "War? What war?", how to get one's political comedy mojo back and the vitally important topic of moat-dredging. It's a LOT more relevant than you might think.

162 Podcast Asks Why Did They Run

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 03 May 2009 17:46:21 +0000

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This week's feature interview is with Reut Cohen, host of Pajamas TV's Shairia and Jihad Review show.

Meryl Yourish assesses the damage from the Iranian President's call for peace, tolerance, acceptance and the total extermination of the Jews in Geneva, Damian Penny explains why companies that can't make cars that people are prepared to buy perhaps shoyldn;r be in business, and Doug Payton asks the question of the week of all those New Yorkers who took one look at a large jet flying low towards Manhattan and ran for their lives.

Host Tom Paine rises to make a personal statement to the House about the current unpleasantness in the conservative blogosphere and mention is made of May Day and Cinqo De Mayo.

161 Podcast Takes Tea with the Vicar

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 13:28:55 +0000

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This week's special guest is our old Shire Network News friend Andrew Ian Dodge who's moved back to the US and is now a regular correspondent and pundit on Pyjamas Media. You can find out all about him at Dodgeblogium.

I take it upon myself to review the podcast "No Agenda" staring Adam Curry and John C Dvorak. You can find their slightly demented rantings at the show's site: No Agenda.

In blog news this week we hear from Emeritus Professor of Advanced Brain Studies at the Massachusets State Home for the Bewildered, Dr Jeannene Garofalo. Oh dear.

We also comment on the fun and games at Durban II. The audio we play is from the UN Watch.

At the end of the show we play the audio from a video of a typical street in Israel at the time the siren sounds commemorating the memorial for the Holocaust: Yom HaShoa.

160 Podcast Goes Naval on Pirate Butt

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 13:56:22 +0000

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This week's guest is our former regular contributor, Evan Sayet. He's now got himself a regular radio talk show in the US. Details of which will be posted at his web site, evansayet.com at some point soon.

The Mark Steyn piece we quote from can be found in The Corner.

If you're interested in what Shire Network News sounded like way back in 2006, you can still download it from our old site and find out how we talked about Somali pirates way back then.

159 - Podcast is Fooling around on Campus

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 08:25:07 +0000

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This week Shire Network News talks to Dr Richard Cravatts, director of Boston University's Program in Publishing at the Center for Professional Education, who is currently writing a book entitled "Genocidal Liberalism: The University's Jihad Against Israel". We'll link to his book as soon as we can.

In Blog News this week we take a look at how D-Day would have happened if the current Muppets running the UK had been in charge instead of Winston Churchill. Oh dear.

A whining Jew in England doesn't like being associated with Israel. We have the Elders of Zions' answer to her. I can't link to the corresponding post on Yourish.com as Meryl is currently dealing with an antisemitic hacker issue.

Damian Penny returns to the show. Let us know what you think of his return from Purgatory.

And Meryl is talking about the Oliphant cartoon which you can see on Slate.

I'm sorry for the delay. If anyone can give me a quiet place to record, local to North Tel Aviv on a Sunday or Monday, get in touch!

158 - Podcast Parades Past Luton

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 14:42:01 +0000

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This weeks guest is former Muslim, Adil Zeshan talking about the recent incident in Luton in which returning soldiers were abused in the streets of Luton by Muslim protesters.

Meryl Yourish is talking about a Jew hating English director, Ken Loach. Ken Loach is an antisemite. Are we being clear enough?

Doug Payton is talking about the passing of Ron Silver.

157 - Podcast believes the Jihadis when they say they want to kill us

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 17:12:37 +0000

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On this week's show the guest is Professor Barry Rubin of the The Global Research in International Affairs Center in Israel, talking about the statement made by Khalid Sheikh Mohammed and his fellow 9/11 conspiratiors at Guantamo Bay taking credit for the atrocity, and why western politicians simply refuse to listen to the enemy when they announce their goals and motives clearly.

In blog news we cover the decision of the French to rejoin NATO. But does anyone else want them?

Abdullah Ghulam Rasoul was released from Gitmo, only to head off and kill British soldiers. Surprised? Not us.

The Pope is very very sorry and promises to learn how to use the Internet. More details in The Times.

The strange case of Lord Nazir Ahmed of Rotherham: why did he only go to prison for a handful of days?

Meryl Yourish is talking about British MP George Galloway and makes reference to a simply disgusting YouTube clip. View it at your own peril as it is below.

Doug Payton is covering the Chas Freemon story. We had to, some of us are Jews.

And thank you to all for listening and don't forget, tell all your friends!

156 - Podcast Gets Trapped By A Mob

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 04:30:48 +0000

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This week's inaugural show for 2009 takes a look at recent anti-Jewish violence and intimidation on Canadian university campuses; looks down it's nose at a lefty public servant in Australia who looks down her nose at her social inferiors; salutes the brave Polish fliers who served in the RAF during the Battle of Britain while simultaneously noting that Nick Griffin and the British National Party are gigantic knobs; thinks Newsweek's advice about living with radical Islam might work, except for all the killing; notes the passing of newsman Paul Harvey; analyses the recent Israeli election with a new SNN contributor; and wonders why the beheading murder of a prominent Muslim's wife in New York is receiving the same level of global media attention as the Chipping Norton Borough Council Town Planning subcommittee report on sewerage reticulation for 2007.

155 - Podcast is making some announcements

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 19:43:57 +0000

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This is a short announcement show. The podcasting side of our host is shutting down any day and this show is primarily aimedat those of you who download the show automatically via iTunes.

We will be announcing our new web site and show feeds as soon as they are ready but in the meantime if you want to sign upto be notified, please send an email to listen @ shirenetworknews.net and we'll make sure you get a message about it.

And thank you all, once again, for your contributions and for your patience while we get up and running again.

This week's closing quote is from Menachem Begin:

I have written this book primarily for my own people, lest the Jew forget again--as he so disastrously forgot in the past--this simple truth: that there are things more precious than life, and more horrible than death.
But I have written this book also for Gentiles, lest they be unwilling to realise, or all too ready to overlook, the fact that out of blood and fire and tears and ashes a new specimen of human being was born, a specimen completely unknown to the world for over eighteen hundred years, "the Fighting Jew." That Jew, whom the world considered dead and buried never to rise again, has arisen. For he has learned that "simple truth" of life and death, and he will never again go down to the sides of the pit and vanish from the face of the earth.

The Revolt by Menachem Begin p. x i.

154 - Podcast goes Back into Gaza

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 21:42:17 +0000

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We're back and broadcasting Shire Network News again. This week we've put together a cracking show featuring old favorites and a special timely interview with former guest, Professor Barry Rubin, Director, Global Research in International Affairs (GLORIA) Center and Editor, Middle East Review of International Affairs (MERIA) Journal.

He is talking to us direct from Israel where he is only just outside Hamas rocket range. He's also got some very wise words for us all on not taking the media too seriously and the implications for the rest of the world of criticism of Israel's actions in trying to deal with the Hamas terrorist threat.

Please feel free to follow your host, Brian of London on Twitter. In Blog News we hear some Hamas terrorist biographies from Israellycool Dave's site. You should be following Dave's site for the best live blogging with his own brand of commentary.

We also hear Victor Davis Hanson's suggestions for how the Israelis could be a bit more "proportional" in their response.

It's been a long time but this much Gaza noise and the fact that it even invaded his cozy world of Second Life, has brought our old friend Laurence Simon out of retirement. You can find him on line at his site "This blog is full of crap" where you'll find links to his other work. Laurence mentions sending a pizza to the IDF which you can do from Pizza IDF.

Meryl Yourish is also, of course, right on top of this topic. Please visit her excellent and constantly updated blog.

We close with an extract from a particularly strong speech given by Winston Churchill. I urge you to read the whole thing. The Munich Agreement.

I will also re-iterate here: we are looking to raise money to make this show grow substantially. Please help us out if you can. We've provided years of top quality news, satire, humour and entertainment: you decide if that has been worth something to you. And to all who have donated all ready our very heartiest thanks!

If you would like to advertise on our show, please get in touch!

So with that, I commend this show to the house!

153 - Podcast Looks Back at 2009

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 03:08:28 +0000

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Yes your iTunes feed is not deceiving you! Shire Network News is back for one more show before Christmas. We've pulled out all the stops to bring you a whole new show with contributions from Shire Network News regulars, Meryl Yourish and Doug Payton. Both are looking back on what a fine year 2009 (yes Two Thousand and NINE) has been

In addition, Tom has been hard at work in the cutting room pulling together some of his favorite blog news items from over three years of material. I'm sure you'll agree that good satire never goes stale. Except for the story about the French rejecting the European Union. That story is so old we've had at least four more attempts by European faceless minions to foist the sorry constitution on their various peoples since that rejection.

Tom is serious in the show, we are looking at putting on a major marketing effort in the new year and any donations you make (see the button to the right) will go toward expanding the show's audience. And not pay for Brian to be able to listen to live coverage of the numerous defeats of the England cricket team.

As ever, enjoy the show and see you all next year!

152 - Podcast tells Bush forget it Marshal, it's only a tin star

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 03:15:38 +0000

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Here it is, the long awaited, we're not sulking, back from the dead episode of Shire Network News. This week its a round table discussion between Tom Paine, Brian of London, Meryl Yourish and Doug Payton.

We're looking for your feedback!

151 - Podcast Wants You To Vote For John McCain

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 02 Nov 2008 03:16:14 +0000

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This week the show simply asks American citizens for their vote, in this most crucial US election.

We'll hear direct appeals from the show's main interviewer, "Tom Paine", and contributors Meryl Yourish, Doug Payton and Evan Sayet.

Brian of London isn't here today, but he wants you all to know that even though he's as yet a non-citizen, he has some serious skin n this game, as he's just dropped a thousand pounds on McCain to win at 5-1.

Will McCain win?

He'd BETTER!

150 - Podcast says never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 03:51:50 +0000

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This week Shire Network News struggles to remain upbeat and cheerful. We will not lose, we will not lose. This week's guest, Kathy Shaidle, has just released her new book (co-written with Peter Vere): "The Tyranny of Nice: how Canada crushes freedom in the name of human rights -- and why it matters to Americans".

If you order the book from Mark Steyn's site, he'll even autograph it for you.

Kathy blogs at five feet of fury and speaks to us about the abuses of the Canadian Human Rights system.

This week the show features almost all of our more regular contributors:

Evan Sayet is on and keeping the tone optimistic. You can find details of his conservative comedy show at his web site.

Doug Payton is asking us to think carefully as usual.

Peter Glover returns, soggy and enraged, from Wales.

Meryl Yourish is very happy not to have become a journalist.

Blog News this week has been replaced by a pep talk from our glorious leader. No, not him, the other one, Tom Paine.

149 - Podcast Listens to an American Carol

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 04:02:51 +0000

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In a world where truth has been inverted and nobody knows what is going on any more, Brian of London returns to Shire Network News to bring you the interview of the year.

This week Tom Pain, senior Shire Network News film critic speaks to the Director of probably this year's most universally panned movie (in the main stream media). Yes we speak to David Zucker, director of An American Carol. David speaks to us about the movie's initial reception and the process behind getting an overtly conservative movie out of Hollywood.

Meanwhile in our Blog News section we have, once again, sunk to the level of over covering the US Presidential Elections. Regular service will return moking Jihadis as soon as we can.

We first cover some of the overt attempts to rig the ballot and register new voters. For some reason no one is concentrating on rounding up unregistered Republicans. Take a look at HolyCoast.com for more details. Michelle Malkin is covering the less than public goings on as well.

Our final part of this story, covering the horrific attempt to disenfranchise imaginary-Americans comes from Iowahawk.

If, for some reason, you want to learn more about Cynthia McKinney's claim that the US government executed 5000 prisoners and dumped them in Louisiana's swamps under cover of Katrina: go ahead.

It is from Jim Treacher that we learn the left's reaction to McLame's claim that Obama is his "Opponent".

As ever, Evan Sayet is on hand and you can catch Evan Sayet's "Right to Laugh", an evening of conservative comedy every third Tuesday of the month at the World Famous Laugh Factory on the Sunset Strip in Los Angeles.

Doug Payton is wondering why nobody is suggesting that we cut the spending instead of raising the taxes.

And if anyone can offer Brian of London the use of a RECORDING STUDIO when he visits Israel, these shows might come out on time and not be plagued with background noise when he finds himself trying to record a show on a park bench in the middle of the night, eventually giving up because the Damn Crickets were so loud.

148 - Podcast Enjoys Fictional Explody Goodness

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 03:46:07 +0000

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In this week's edition of Shire Network News, our guest is Australian writer John Birmingham, who has just published a book in which the Left gets it's oft-stated wish that the world wakes up one day and America is simply not there anymore. It's called "Without Warning", and we must warn prospective readers, it contains plenty of what John Birmingham calls "explody goodness".

We hear disturbing evidence of the cult-like worship of the Dear Leader, Obama, patron Saint of Hopeful Change and helmsman of all our destinies, Slow Joe Biden does a passable impersonation of Grandpa Simpson and alerts us all to the real danger we're in from....er....corn syrup. So it looks like that long-awaited carpet bombing of Iowa is getting the green light from Washington on Inauguration Day then. That'll teach those Iowans not to dis Delware's most famous Senator on Caucus night.

The BBC gets a caning from Muslim clerics for not bending over and saying "thank you sir, may I have another" enough, Muslims get to hold religious events on state property and the ACLU doesn't dare utter a sound, and the one-eyed nature of Saudi religiosity is finally revealed for all the world to see.

Meryl Yourish says Sarah Palin is making Democrats go a little funny in the head, and Evan Sayet is not surprised that the endorsement of Sarah Palin by the chair of the Los Angeles chapter of the National Organisation of Women has apparently slipped down the memory hole as far as the media is concerned.

Doug Payton arises like Lazarus from a bed of pain to talk about political philosophy, but honestly it's way more interesting and relevants than that sounds.

Go and see "An American Carol" this week please, in fact we are hoping to be able to speak to the film's director, David Zucker, on the podcast next week. Oh, and if you're holding off on helping the McCain campaign because you figure he's "not conservative enough" for your personal tastes, how would you feel about four years of "The Jimmy Carter Presidency, Part Two - This Time He's Black, Not That It Makes The Slightest Difference To His Incompetence And Instinctive Desire to Appease the Enemy?

I lived through the 70's, trust me on this, you do NOT want a re-run of that. Besides, disco sucked hard enough the first time, and the thought of having to endure constant jihadi suicide attacks on our major domestic population centers while having nothing but Bee Gees tribute groups or KC and the Sunshine Band retrospectives to listen to on the radio is simply too much to bear.

147 - Podcast Explains Astroturfing for Fun and Profit

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 03:43:19 +0000

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This week's guest is Dr Rusty Shackleford, proprietor and founder of the My Pet Jawa Blog. Using just his computer and an internet connection he stumbled on what looks like a possible campaign scandal. His first post on this broke the story to the world.

Rusty explains to us exactly what astroturfing and sockpuppetry are and the steps he and his team of web sleuths went through to do the job the Main Stream Media won't do for you.

In Blog News this week we look into the British Identity card that seems to carry no sign of British identity. Eurabia here we come!

Weird Fatwa of the week is all about mouse extermination and it doesn't stop at real mice, oh no, cartoons are once again raising the ire of Muslims.

The Washington Post is not a reliable source for the McCain campaign to cite in campaign adverts. According to the Washington Post.

CAIR now believes we can blame the people who flew into buildings on 9-11 in addition to the United States. Thank you. And from Iraq, internal Al Qeda memos have surfaced in the hands of yet another dead Muslim terrorist.

Doug Payton joins us again with his top nine answers Ahmadinejad would give at a presidential debate.

Meryl Yourish gives us one of her best ever pieces (we're not biased) comparing the speech of Ahmadinejad at the UN with the speeches of Hitler. Hitler quotes are voiced by us (no we haven't discovered unknown recordings). This is powerful stuff. Zionist = Jew is the filthy trick he's using and the world, almost to a man, is buying it again.

Brian makes some reference to his postings on Israellycool. Stick that in your RSS reader.

Evan will return when he can.

146 - Podcast Criticises 'Critical Terrorism Studies'

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 03:36:30 +0000

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In Shire Network News this week,we speak to Australian academic, Dr Mervyn Bendle, who has queried the appointment of a man who doesn't believe the West is better than the Jihadi terrorists, to a teaching position at the Australian Defence College. Needless to say, in the politicised world of modern intellectual life, it's the whistleblower who finds himself up on a charge.

We endorse a new candidate for the Presidency, although he bears a curious resemblance to one that's already running. His slogan? "Less community organising, more airlocking of Cylons".

Canadian Greens make a gaffe and then decide the best way to put out the fire is to hurl some petrol on it

We check the actual transcript of the interview Charles Gibson did with Vice-Presidential candidate Sarah Palin and discover one or two discrepancies.

This just in - Obama says McCain is old! So old, he doesn't use e-mail! Yeah, well there's a pretty good reason for that, dumbass. You could ask the North Vietnamese what they know about it, or failing that you might want to spend a couple on minutes to, oh I don't know, USE GOOGLE TO FIND OUT MCCAIN WAS CRIPPLED DUE TO BEING TORTURED BY THE ENEMY! But maybe that's just too modern for the Obama campaign.

UK Labour Prime Minister Gordon Brown is now so unpopular that he's become the target of a couple of those subtitled clips from "Downfall" that have become so popular on You Tube. We also play the new quiz craze that's sweeping Britain, "What the Bloody Hell Is John Prescott Trying Yo Say"?

Hollywood satirist and conservative activist Evan Sayet turns fashion critic, as he details just how many pairs of gloves Obama has taken off so far in this campaign.

And Our Man In Britain, Peter Glover, has a few choice words to say about Guardian columnist Johnathan Freedland, who warns America that the world will not allow you to vote against Obama, and if you do happen to elect John McCain, well....in that case...er....we'll pretty much treat you with the sort of lofty disdain we do already. Um, but you'll still protect us if the bad men come, right?

From the frozen tundra of the great white north we hail the welcome return of Canadian blogger Damian Penny, who gives us far more information than we ever wanted on Andrew Sullivan's private life, and some free advice for poor wee Andy, whose delicate spirits are being brutally crushed under the weight of reality.

145 - Podcast Produces Palinpalooza

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 03:29:02 +0000

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It's all-Palin, all the time here on Shire Network News this week, as the race suddenly gets flipped and Republicans look like winners. Naturally, we mock our chums in the Democratic Party and the media (but we repeat ourselves).

There are scandals involving a British soldier being refused a hotel room, verbal inexactitude from Senator Obama which would have earned President Bush a scathing Moment of Zen from Jon Stewart, the Democratic Party has a message for all those women out there, and an Iraq war veteran has a message for Senator Obama.

Oh, and we have some rather disturbing love of nature.

The feature interview is with El Marco, whose photoblog, Looking At The Left is doing sterling work in exposing the reality of leftist protests. He used to be a Canadian hippie you know.

Meryl Yourish hearts Governor Sarah Palin. Doug Payton hearts Palin as well. And hey, what do you know, so does Evan Sayet! Is this a trend? Oh, support conservative comedy! Go see Evan's show in Los Angeles, third Tuesday of ever month. Right To Laugh. Be there or be somewhere else.

Brian of London is .... missing in action. His subtle guiding hand may have helped coax this show onto the interweb, but we know not where he is.

144 - Podcast swept up in Uberobamamessiahrama

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 03:25:45 +0000

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For the second week, we are talking to David Horowitz of the David Horowitz Freedom Center. He talks to Tom about the direction the Democratic party is taking and how this is rooted in the politics of the 1960's. They discuss the take over of the College Campuses and the importance (or not) of Europe.

In blog news this week we have a bit of thing for Sarah Palin. Well you can hardly blame us can you? Have you seen how many guns she has?

Meryl Yourish has some excellent work about Sarah Palin. This post by Atlas is also rather good: RNC Lynch Mob. The Roslin/Airlock '08 campaign would look like this.

For the imposition of Ramadan on unwitting Dhimmis, look to the Daily Mail.

Also from the Daily Mail comes the despicable story of rape in Calais.

Evan Sayet chats with Tom Paine about Obama's Greek Odyssey and you can find out more about Evan's monthly show, Right to Laugh, at the website of the Laugh Factory.

Doug Payton is also making a welcome return. Check out his site.

143 - Podcast goes Back to the USSR with David Horowitz

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 03:21:47 +0000

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This week Shire Network News becomes the Shiresky Neit-Work Pravda podcast. We've gone over to the left and our guest this week is one time Marxist, David Horowitz from the David Horowitz Freedom Center. He talks to Tom about the direction the Democratic party is taking and how this is rooted in the politics of the 1960's.

In blog news this week we discuss whether the US Military or even the Taliban are human beings. This after a BBC reporter calls for us to acknowledge the humanity of the Taliban.

From Egypt comes news of an ad campaign to encourage women to enslave themseleves, sorry, cover up. And it's not worried about sun burn.

And I also mention the Olympic closing ceremony.

Look, if you're reading the show notes but you don't listen to the show, you're really missing something. Give it a try, download the file or click play up to the right of the screen.

Evan Sayet chats with Tom Paine about Obama's choice of Veep and you can find out more about Evan's monthly show, Right to Laugh, at the website of the Laugh Factory.

If you think that you, or someone you know, may be close to converting to left wing hysteria and voting for Obama, please introduce them to our show. It's not too late, almost anyone can be saved.

142 - Podcast Goes to a Typical English University

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 03:19:10 +0000

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Douglas Murray, the Director of the Centre for Social Cohesion think tank, joins us for a talk about the latest report from his think tank. It's a bombshell report on the attitudes of Muslim students in the UK.

It makes for exceptionally disturbing reading

Douglas Murray says many of the Muslim leaders in Britain who constantly complain about their faith being depicted as being at odds with the country's values seem to not be aware that it's often they themselves who go out of their way to give people precisely that impression.

Do go to the center's website and download the whole report in PDF format.

In Blog News we talk about the difference in style between Obama and McCain when answering questions like, does evil exist. Obama is not sure what to do about it. McCain knows.

More jihadis are caught and convicted in the UK. World Yawns.

Your humble host, Brian of London, signed the petition to ask the UK government to bin the EU "treaty". This week Gordon Brown said no:

The Irish government has made it clear that they need time to analyse the result and its implications, and to consult widely at home and abroad. At the European Council on 19/20 June, EU Heads of State and Government agreed with the Irish Government’s proposal that they should reflect on the result of the referendum and then submit a report to the European Council in October. In the meantime the Council, including Ireland, has noted that the ratification processes are continuing in all of the other Member States.

We have our regular chat with Evan Sayet and you can find details of his now regular comedy show at the Laugh Factory.

Doug Payton is back and talking about AQTV. Find his writings at his site.

141 - Podcast helps Ibn Warraq Defend the West

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 03:16:59 +0000

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For the second week, our guest is author and activist Ibn Warraq, who has been writing and speaking against Jihadi Islam for decades. His work on what the Koran really says, and what the core of Islam is really about is the kind of writing and thinking that Islam's phobia of self criticism makes impossible from within Islam. You can find Part 1 of his interview here.

He's the author of many books, such as Why I am Not A Muslim and editor of The Origins of the Koran, The Quest for the Historical Muhammad, What the Koran Really Says, and Leaving Islam.

His latest work is "Defending the West: A Critique of Edward Said's Orientalism".

You can also find regular articles by Ibn Warraq at the tremendous site, New English Review.

Our first story: Almighty Allah busted on drug charges can be found WTNH.com. There really wasn't too much point in re-writing that story, it was too good the way it was.

The Russians invaded Georgia. The Left blamed America. News? Or Israel.

The story from New Zealand of the vanishing polygamy and polyandry speech can be not found on the govt site here. Or found on another site where it has been carefully saved from Google Cache.

Ezra Levant's own site is a good source for news of his antics. The particular interview we play comes from John Oakley.

We speak, as ever, to Evan Sayet and you can find details of his now regular comedy show at the Laugh Factory.

140 - Podcast knows why it is not a Muslim

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 03:12:19 +0000

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Our guest is author and activist Ibn Warraq, who has been writing and speaking against Jihadi Islam for decades. His work on what the Koran really says, and what the core of Islam is really about is the kind of writing and thinking that Islam's phobia of self criticism makes impossible from within Islam.

He's the author of many books, such as Why I am Not A Muslim and editor of The Origins of the Koran, The Quest for the Historical Muhammad, What the Koran Really Says, and Leaving Islam.

His latest work is "Defending the West: A Critique of Edward Said's Orientalism".

You can also find regular articles by Ibn Warraq at the tremendous site, New English Review.

The tremendous ad for Mohammed Condoms comes from The Nose On Your Face. Head there to see the accompanying video.

For more on the Jew-Zionist-Death-monster Rats in Jerusalem, head over here.

Details on the $30,000 worth of T-shirts bought by two brothers in Gaza can be found at World Net Daily. Atlas Shrugs, however, has been on this story from the start.

We speak, as ever, to Evan Sayet and you can find details of his now regular comedy show at the Laugh Factory.

Finally, we end the show with the song Appeasement by Weapon of Musical Defense. Their new web site is taking shape and from there you can download your very own, pristine copy of the song.

139 - Podcast goes to the Wall

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 17:52:00 +0000

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138 - Podcast supports Clintons for McCain

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 00:00:00 +0000

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This week our feature interview is with Anne Franklin, a spokesman for Clintons For McCain, Hillary Clinton supporters who are working overtime to defeat Barak Obama in November.

That's right, independents and Democrats who are so alarmed at the prospect of an Obama presidency that they're supporting Republican nominee John McCain.

Ann Franklin, herself an independent, tells SNN's in house spin doctor "Tom Paine" why Clintons For McCain feel America can't afford what would probably turn out to be a Dhimmi Carter second term.

In other news this week we take aim at the BBC's shocking, but unsurprising view that in drama, Christians can cut off the heads of Muslims. Way to go BBC. There are many links in Doug's blog post on this subject (which formed the basis for this news report): Beyond Parody.

The astonishing Hamas hand bunny chop clip has to be seen on Memri.

For the definitive puff piece on Obama, head over to The Onion.

This wee we are graced with pieces from Peter Glover and Doug Payton. Check out their own sites.

The final quote from Dan Gilerman can be found over at Israellycool.

137 - Podcast demands Right to Laugh in Canada

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 18:51:46 +0000

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Canada's Human Rights apparatus is at it again! We talk this week to Guy Earle, who committed the unpardonable sin of having a go at some hecklers at a show in Vancouver.

They were lesbians, and it turns out the British Columbia Human Rights Tribunal has decreed lesbians are permanently out of season and probably a doubly protected species (they're Gay and Women!), so now Guy Earle is in the same boat as Mark Steyn and Ezra Levant.

Read more about his impending legal fight at his website. If you're in Toronto on the 19th, do be sure to support Guy Earle's fight with the anti-free-speech bureaucracy by going along to the Comics for Freedom Rally at The Comedy Bar which is at 945B Floor West.

In Blog news this week we express our support for the left wingers (I know, I know) over at Harry's Place who are getting into a legal battle with Hamas. Well done for drawing them out into the open where the rest of us can snipe that them! More about those people who are withdrawing from IslamExpo can be found here.

The use of the term Black Hole (by anyone except Stephen Hawkins we assume) is now not allowed in racially hyper aware America. More details from Michell Malkin and Five Feet of Fury.

Despite what the NYT or Fox or any other mainstream outlets might say, the latest Fauxtography scoop came from LGF. The Iranian reports of Israelis fleeing Israel (which seem to be as trustworthy as their photographs) can be found on Ynet.

This week Meryl is discussing Pat Buchanan, Doug has a few things on his mind and Evan is talking about the implications of Guy Earle's prosecution in Canada.

136 - Podcast gives it to Al Jazeera with both barrels

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 18:55:34 +0000

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This week we welcome Dr Mordechai Kedar, of the Arabic Department of Bar-Ilan University in Tel Aviv. While appearing recently on Al Jazeera talking about building apartments in Jerusalem, he decided not to take the role of a pinata as expected by the show's host.

He informed the Al Jazeera interviewer that what Israel does in its own capital was none of the Arab world's business as it has been the capital of the Jewish people for three thousand years, ever since the ancestors of the Arabs had been burying their infant daughters live, drinking wine and worshiping stone idols.

You can watch the exchange on YouTube. I should point out that this clip appeared online first in the original Arabic and it was with the help of Palestinian Media Watch that the clip was subtitled in English.

Also on the show this week we cover the extraordinary pronouncement by the most senior Judge in Britain that maybe Sharia isn't so bad. Melanie Phillips' (no relation) blog is a good place to look.

Eye on the UN produced the video of David Littman being shouted down by Egypt while trying to speak about Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) at the UN Human Rights Council.

Barry Rubin wrote the tremendous piece noting the New York Time's 1924 headline: "Hitler Tamed By Prison; Released on Parole, He Is Expected to Return to Austria.". You can find his article here: Prisoner Rehabilitated; Fifty Million Die.

Two crazy kid stories out of the UK. Nursery teachers on the look out for nursery Nazis and teenagers who refuse to kneel and pray to Allah.

The short quote from Danny Gillerman comes from Israellycool Dave's blog. Find it here.

This week we are joined once again by Peter Glover speaking about Israel's flying pigs.

Evan Sayet would very much like you to know about his up coming show "Right to Laugh" in Hollywood on 22nd July. More details here.

Doug Payton is back and sounding better than ever.

135 - Podcast is back in English hands again

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 18:58:10 +0000

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Shire Network News is back and this week we continue with Part 2 of our interview with journalist Bill Bishop, author of "The Big Sort: Why the Clustering of Like-Minded America Is Tearing Us Apart". He says America is increasingly divided, not just politically, but by basic, fundamental world views.

You can find his book at Amazon: The Big Sort: Why the Clustering of Like-Minded America Is Tearing Us Apart.

In blog news this week we look at the use of sniffer dogs in the UK. Guess which religion has a problem with sniffer dogs. I don't know, they had the cutest beagle at JFK. Adorable.

For more Latin Mottos for Obama, head over to IMAO. And I will apologise for my merciless massacre of the Latin. Sorry.

For the full comedy video from Canada, head over to YouTube. Beware.... there be bad language there!

This week's new boy is Peter Glover. You can find his blog and other work here. Say hello and tell us what you think in the comments.

And you can find out more about Evan and his show, "Right to Laugh" at his website: http://www.evansayet.com/

134 - Podcast clusters into tribes led by a Gentile

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 18:59:57 +0000

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This week's show is hosted by former tea boy, Doug Payton. The feature interview this week is with journalist Bill Bishop, author of "The Big Sort: Why the Clustering of Like-Minded America Is Tearing Us Apart". He says America is increasingly divided, not just politically, but by basic, fundamental world views.

You can find his book at Amazon: The Big Sort: Why the Clustering of Like-Minded America Is Tearing Us Apart .

We have blog news this week, but you'll have to listen to the show to find out what's in it!

After a long period spent doing... who knows what, Damian Penny is back with a piece on the Canadian free speech fights.

Meryl Yourish turns in a piece this week on a wide variety of subjects.

Tom Paine has his usual chat with Evan Sayet. You can find his blog here.

133 - Podcast asks a New Statesman about the British Left

editors@shirenetworknews.net (Tom Paine, Brian of London and others) — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 19:02:49 +0000

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Every now and then, someone in the Left takes a long look around and realises that there might be something in the state of their movement. Latest in this distinguished line is Martin Bright the political editor with the left-leaning New Statesman magazine.

When Israel marked it's 60th anniversary recently, he decided to marek the occasion by publishing an article questioning the Left's increasingly hysterical assaults on the country, which have escalated from criticism of individual policies to an outright questioning of it's very legitimacy and existence.

The article was called "The Great Betrayal".

As regular listeners to Shire Network News will probably have guessed by listening to our previous chats with another UK left wing journalist Nick Cohen, who also raised these issues, Martin Bright found that the sky fell on him.

In blog news this week we take a look at a video that LGF linked to guessing what today's media might have said about the D-Day landings.

Are you in fact, not ready to be A Good Democrat and just pull the lever for Obama. There are some signs, as listed in the website "Don't Be a Good Democrat".

George Galloway supports Obama for president. What a surprise. Thank you Memri for bringing us more from this odious cretin.

EU allows privacy invasion of Americans. Another shock I know.

Doug Payton has sent in something this week about a lawless city. Can you guess where?